Help
Sign In
distant relationship
October 2009 
Walking Distance
Posted on Apr 11th, 2009
by 
crudebliss
crudebliss
What can be said about relationships that are soo intense... so pure; yet they lack one thing that is crucial... distance....
I love this Article on how brutally you can analyse your relationship's effectiveness...
Long Distance Love - Who Moves Where?
We can see only so far... can hear only so much, and smell something in even less proximity...
Love is, i think, like a plant... it needs continuous caring and watering and commitment and strength to grow... and literally be a sort of a tree with nurturing qualities like shade and holding soil with strong roots...
Something that takes time at least; and commitment...
what i have learnt from my personal experience is that... it has to be in close proximity...and i don't mean distance wise... (that can change - like the article says above - if your partner gets a job in another location...)
But i mean proximity with beliefs; and etiquette of living... the little things that make both of you; you... coz the love filled poison from the Cupid's arrow ;-) is just a silly chemical thingi that lasts for a year... then you're on your own... with the little things that you like about each other...
It's almost like sex... only in reverse... the foreplay (a lasting relationship) is more important then the ejaculation (being love)
But i mean.... the true strong ones of us are like... hunters, warriors... and want and always have run for something that is IMPOSSIBLE...
and we do indeed need that sensation and drive in us... to be better... to achieve the higher... but i just want to say one thing... if we don't involve God in anything... then it's useless... like a body without a soul... it can be as beautiful as it can be... but it's lifeless... simply meaningless...
Love Is not beautiful without God in it...trust me; it's NOT...
No matter how wild and dreamy your relationship is.. it's alll in Vain without GOd...
So many fall in love and indeed kill themselves; when it doesn't materialise or get too much intoxicated by it... that they loose meaning to other things and goals in life...
It's something that is worth a chance definitely...
Love requires respect from both sides... sincerity and most of all genuine proximity to thrive... ahh and lets not forget the God factor...
There was a time when Lord Swaminarayan said that ":we have incarnated so many times as humans that the amount of milk that we have drunk amounts to the seas"; if that were to be put into any logical perception... then; we have lived and loved for all those lifetimes too...
So don't dispare... if you ask me... love is nothing but resonance... qualities that 2 people share and twin flames and twin souls do exist... but you can never say that you should give up if you loose your love...
YES if you do give up.. then you have to be a saint or a nun ;-) but if you want to stay in this insane world... you've got to gamble for love... and i mean... keeping Him (God) in your heart and make your way Through fires at times for the sake of Love; but with complete love... not with resentment or pain when it fails you... for love is just about giving to the other... nothing more... nothing less.
I'm really inspired by this simple truth...
out of a billion+ sperms; only one gets to be with the mother ship ;-)
And after so many wiggles and pressing through... after so much effort onto penetrating the wall membrane of the egg... the sperm finally becomes one with the egg...
And !!! The egg actually releases a sort of chemical... that strengthens the walls so that no other sperm can come inside....
Now that is something to be admired about in nature.... that a Woman should secrete a chemical (become almost numb towards Her man only) and stay special to Him... and Him to her... and then only... can something as beautiful as a child... a miracle happen.
Love is something very powerful...
Don't play with it's potential...
Just try and try again...
it's a hopeless game... mind you.. ;-)
Sometimes... i wonder if the age old debate of an arranged marriage or a love marriage is any true for the former
I will say one thing..
Indian families are like one cohesion atom... one family member acts out of bound and the whole atom is unstable...
Yet there is one simple truth about our parents... THEY KNOW US...
what a weird realisation... but yes... our parents really know us... how we think and how we act and to top it all up.. they are NOT affected by hormones as wildly as we are... and hence our OWN judgement is clouded about OURSELF.. only someone out of our skin can tell us our mistakes and errors.. we are tooo prideful in the first place to judge... they make perfact referees... and they know exactly what and where we are going wrong.. and most of the time.. they are right... and we fail to listen to their advice...
they (the ones who are truely good Indian parents) are representatives of God... and their thoughts really manifest.. and just like the Law of attraction is a reality.. their judgment and their choice of a partner sometimes really does fit in quite well with there children...It's labeled arranged... but then again... what isn;t in this world...
everything is arranged if we come to think of it.. it's just that we choose to pick something which is arranged already.
say you chose something... even something complicated as a person; but it was arranged already... YOU didn;t make him/her....
You never were there with your lover the whole time... so many things were arranged for that lover of yours to be what s/he is now... EXPERIENCES mostly; that's what makes a being...
You are just experiencing something that had gone through so many arrangements over so many eons of years...
do you see what i am saying...?
Don't be downed if you have lost on love...
the law of attraction really does work... so the answer to all your relationship problems is...
How is your lover aiding your relationship with God; coz in the end.. that's what counts (A relationship with God)
And you can change the word "Lover" above to:
wealth
health
;-)
I know i dig a hole sometimes where i'm not supposed to; but i like to stir up things and see what settles... and in this world of insanity... it's better to pinch and push things to the limit; to see what settles... most of the time... there are 3 types of people... one is like water; the other is like metal and the last is like glass.
The Glass kind... never progress... coz they break and live misarebly their whole life... or even kill themselves if they can't handle the pain...
then there are people who are like metal; they are alittle hard headed... yet, can be twisted and forged again in a new shape... but with allot of effort and heat...
the last kind are like the great people that ever lived... they are like water... they can take any shape that they are given... and don;t have prerequisite's... they just have love for everything... even the devil... they feel sorry for the devil and even fall for the devil... unto how will this devil attain salvation... ;-)
Someday; you'll know the life that needs the calling of your faith...
Awww great song...
Dedicated to Stephanie the most beautiful mother i know; and to her angels.
I love this Article on how brutally you can analyse your relationship's effectiveness...
Long Distance Love - Who Moves Where?
We can see only so far... can hear only so much, and smell something in even less proximity...
Love is, i think, like a plant... it needs continuous caring and watering and commitment and strength to grow... and literally be a sort of a tree with nurturing qualities like shade and holding soil with strong roots...
Something that takes time at least; and commitment...
what i have learnt from my personal experience is that... it has to be in close proximity...and i don't mean distance wise... (that can change - like the article says above - if your partner gets a job in another location...)
But i mean proximity with beliefs; and etiquette of living... the little things that make both of you; you... coz the love filled poison from the Cupid's arrow ;-) is just a silly chemical thingi that lasts for a year... then you're on your own... with the little things that you like about each other...
It's almost like sex... only in reverse... the foreplay (a lasting relationship) is more important then the ejaculation (being love)
But i mean.... the true strong ones of us are like... hunters, warriors... and want and always have run for something that is IMPOSSIBLE...
and we do indeed need that sensation and drive in us... to be better... to achieve the higher... but i just want to say one thing... if we don't involve God in anything... then it's useless... like a body without a soul... it can be as beautiful as it can be... but it's lifeless... simply meaningless...
Love Is not beautiful without God in it...trust me; it's NOT...
No matter how wild and dreamy your relationship is.. it's alll in Vain without GOd...
So many fall in love and indeed kill themselves; when it doesn't materialise or get too much intoxicated by it... that they loose meaning to other things and goals in life...
It's something that is worth a chance definitely...
Love requires respect from both sides... sincerity and most of all genuine proximity to thrive... ahh and lets not forget the God factor...
There was a time when Lord Swaminarayan said that ":we have incarnated so many times as humans that the amount of milk that we have drunk amounts to the seas"; if that were to be put into any logical perception... then; we have lived and loved for all those lifetimes too...
So don't dispare... if you ask me... love is nothing but resonance... qualities that 2 people share and twin flames and twin souls do exist... but you can never say that you should give up if you loose your love...
YES if you do give up.. then you have to be a saint or a nun ;-) but if you want to stay in this insane world... you've got to gamble for love... and i mean... keeping Him (God) in your heart and make your way Through fires at times for the sake of Love; but with complete love... not with resentment or pain when it fails you... for love is just about giving to the other... nothing more... nothing less.
I'm really inspired by this simple truth...
out of a billion+ sperms; only one gets to be with the mother ship ;-)
And after so many wiggles and pressing through... after so much effort onto penetrating the wall membrane of the egg... the sperm finally becomes one with the egg...
And !!! The egg actually releases a sort of chemical... that strengthens the walls so that no other sperm can come inside....
Now that is something to be admired about in nature.... that a Woman should secrete a chemical (become almost numb towards Her man only) and stay special to Him... and Him to her... and then only... can something as beautiful as a child... a miracle happen.
Love is something very powerful...
Don't play with it's potential...
Just try and try again...
it's a hopeless game... mind you.. ;-)
Sometimes... i wonder if the age old debate of an arranged marriage or a love marriage is any true for the former
I will say one thing..
Indian families are like one cohesion atom... one family member acts out of bound and the whole atom is unstable...
Yet there is one simple truth about our parents... THEY KNOW US...
what a weird realisation... but yes... our parents really know us... how we think and how we act and to top it all up.. they are NOT affected by hormones as wildly as we are... and hence our OWN judgement is clouded about OURSELF.. only someone out of our skin can tell us our mistakes and errors.. we are tooo prideful in the first place to judge... they make perfact referees... and they know exactly what and where we are going wrong.. and most of the time.. they are right... and we fail to listen to their advice...
they (the ones who are truely good Indian parents) are representatives of God... and their thoughts really manifest.. and just like the Law of attraction is a reality.. their judgment and their choice of a partner sometimes really does fit in quite well with there children...It's labeled arranged... but then again... what isn;t in this world...
everything is arranged if we come to think of it.. it's just that we choose to pick something which is arranged already.
say you chose something... even something complicated as a person; but it was arranged already... YOU didn;t make him/her....
You never were there with your lover the whole time... so many things were arranged for that lover of yours to be what s/he is now... EXPERIENCES mostly; that's what makes a being...
You are just experiencing something that had gone through so many arrangements over so many eons of years...
do you see what i am saying...?
Don't be downed if you have lost on love...
the law of attraction really does work... so the answer to all your relationship problems is...
How is your lover aiding your relationship with God; coz in the end.. that's what counts (A relationship with God)
And you can change the word "Lover" above to:
wealth
health
;-)
I know i dig a hole sometimes where i'm not supposed to; but i like to stir up things and see what settles... and in this world of insanity... it's better to pinch and push things to the limit; to see what settles... most of the time... there are 3 types of people... one is like water; the other is like metal and the last is like glass.
The Glass kind... never progress... coz they break and live misarebly their whole life... or even kill themselves if they can't handle the pain...
then there are people who are like metal; they are alittle hard headed... yet, can be twisted and forged again in a new shape... but with allot of effort and heat...
the last kind are like the great people that ever lived... they are like water... they can take any shape that they are given... and don;t have prerequisite's... they just have love for everything... even the devil... they feel sorry for the devil and even fall for the devil... unto how will this devil attain salvation... ;-)
Someday; you'll know the life that needs the calling of your faith...
Awww great song...
Dedicated to Stephanie the most beautiful mother i know; and to her angels.
Access: Public
As illogical as it may sound…
People who go on dates are actually looking for something; the way they think; the way they function…
But that is the very thing that keeps changing; thoughts are what make us; true… but thoughts change as the consciousness derives more and more wisdom; more awakening; and at the end; the only way a relationship can last - still the test of time, is when it's based on something that doesn't change…
God realisation; How close are you; how close is your lover; to GOD…
AND then; like Joyce Mayer said; “you become the recipient of Gods grace; (be it in the form of a relationship, wealth, children, health) instead of being the hunter; you turn into the recipient; for you WILL get tired when hunting; and you will find a bigger better prey when You hunt.
Hence; logically, if you want a lasting relationship; work on “Your” relationship with God ! For to the ignorant and athiests; he is very far; and to His devotees; he's the very (nurturing) soul.
;-)
Janak, first your comments about parents actually brought a feeling of tears. How beautiful and I honor you, your parents, your family and the Indian tradition of family. Your words are beautiful and testimony of love, respect and god. Thank you for sharing this.
Oh, love is the highest technique! A direct way to experience god. So of course, if a love is also mindful of the divine and the gift of god, they will be more grateful, joyful and giving, celebrating the meeting and this will bring forth so many wonderful experiences together.
I can well imagine a person who has not dipped their consciousness in divine water will be dry, pulling and unstable. Their vision of love might lack the same expansion as yours. And as you say if the chemicals have sparked with such a person, the exchange is bound to go dry….the limits lie within the consciousness.
and also, Janak, love brings a circle of energy that gives us the experience of being complete. The male and female have different positive poles - the breasts being positive in the female and the penis positive in the male - when there is awareness and these poles met, there is a deep satisfaction and the mind is silent…and the divine is felt in this union, this circle of love. Otherwise, for example, one being born male, the hormones are pushing us to action, pushing us to seek….in a moment with the lover, the seeking is satisfied. In the deep loving embrace all seeking ceases, and we are home, one with ourself and the other.
Love is the greatest technique, a direct line to God.
How long relationships last…oh, how can we know. And in this culture here in America love is easy to come and go….free love is good in one way, but people can then consider it like MacDonalds….and what to say of it? Love has always been difficult and painful, beautiful and liberating. Just as you say, we take our chances.
always stay committed to love…always. Lovers come and go…but love is eternal.
Even today as I sat, I could feel my love of practice, my love of god…like a nun I am in some ways…my love has grown so profoundly for the WAY, for practice and god realization. But merely for sake of love, I do not withdraw from the world. Why? Love is beautiful everywhere.
How close are you to god? that question reflects in my mind as: How much of a lover are you? The closer to god, the greater the lover! The greater the bliss!
thank you, Janak, for such beautiful thoughts and reflections!
I adore you!
Cheyenne
I amaze myself at times… i can't believe that i wrote this blog…
it's so wonderful…
;-D
Loving God… That's all that need to be done… YES !!!
and all this time… me worrying my head off on who the lady will be for me… sometimes… i wonder if EVERYbody would just get this… repeat this… and implement this in their lives…
BTW>>> Love in America… i think it's more of Lust in America… i like to believe that when something comes down to marriage… it has to be taken very seriously… and frankly… either the men there are too mischievous and want to jump from tree to tree like a monkey… ;-) not realising a woman's strength… her wisdom and her shelter that she gives to a house after marriege…
Yes women also can be unfaithful… especailly with the 'Sex and the city' going strong… i have actually not seen one episode of that… that is my choice..
just as it is everyone's free choice… i choose what i think is better… based on what the scriptures say… for i have “Implemented” it's words in my life… (most of the time.. the scriptures are read and repeated in the mind only … and not implemented…)
It's when the heat is on; that's when you go inside the house and close the doors and windows and start the A/C…
(reccesion is actually a good time to get an aquitance with your God… with the scriptures…)
Thanks for commenting
;-) Ha… there is a saying… the sour the mango in it;s infancy; the sweeter it will be when ripe…
who knows… America could be the next place of love and commitment and honor ;-D