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angry
November 2009 
Born free.... as free as the wind blows....
crudebliss
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.... you are born free to follow your own heart.....
There was an interesting talk at home today.... it's said that a murder will kill someone and the next moment would be walking on the street, s/he could have been paid by someone to do this and has no more evil within him/her after committing that crime for s/he also has a family, friends etc and cound be a perfact being after the crime.
But there is something much more profoundly powerful then a common murderer.... we.....
we have with us an inbuilt, burned in our soul, kinda negativity that moves with us.... all the time.... our star....
No doubt that the readers of this blog are all perfact lovers, perfact givers, perfact compassionates; but as long you have a date of birth... and as long you are alive.... you will always have these negative principles of your star that will show their ugly face from time to time:
Aquarius
Intractable & contrary : Very difficult to deal with.
Pisces
Escapist & idealistic : Avoids or forgets unpleasant or boring things.
Selfish & quick tempered : Carrying only about yourself rather than about other people.
Jealous and Possessive : Feeling angry or unhappy because somebody you like is showing interest in somebody or something else.
Gemini
Nervous and tense : Easily worried or frightened.
Cancer
Changeable and moody : Likely to change / often changing.
Pompous and Patronizing : Showing that you think you are more important than others.
Fussy and always worried : Too concerned about worries or standards especially unimportant ones.
Libra
Indecisive and changeable : Unable to make decisions.
Jealous and Resentful : (similar to Taurus)
Blindly optimistic and Careless : Without thinking, expecting good things to happen or something to be successful.
Pessimistic and Fatalistic : Expecting bad things to happen or something not to be successful.
If that was all then that's fine... but your spiritual progress (the ultimate goal of life) will also be hindered by this negative aspect of your star....
I'm a Taurus, so I definitely do have jealousy and possessiveness in me.... When I see that I have no Gaia mail.. I feel the possessive bit in me bite... and so:
- I learn new things about the world, and twin them in colorful ways with traditional ties,
- I sleep 12 hours a day so that I can peak my mind at its highest endurance during the other
12.
- I (the soul) feed my body; my flesh with foods that nurture my mind so that it's able to create this viscous of color that you read, (I'm your mind blowing blogger baby!.... I feel I need to elaborate..
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kise kahoon iss dil ko hai tumne aise churaayaan
hai nikle par armaanno ke, you taking me higher
saiya saiya chhodo mori baiya,
ho na jau dekho crazy with desire
you are my mind blowing maahiyaan - 3
who divided herself into millions of dollars and pounds and euros and gold and silver and (....well anything that can be classified as wealth...) and in so doing, shows ‘Her love for all mankind' and not just one individual....
I have started trusting that I need not do it myself all the time, but that, there are others who will be doing a good/admirable job also of loving you.
The below paragraph is inspired my Marth's blog on 2nd of April.
My economics teacher taught me a law that applies on all and everything that is of this world.. "the law of diminishing utility".
I'll explain.... take for example you are very thirsty, and you have a glass of water... the first glass is always fulfilling, the second one will be so so, the third will actually be painful and the forth will be cursed profusely....
so what changed? the water is the same, the glass the same, the brain receiving the signals the same,.... the law of 'diminishing utility' has kicked in....
We have 2 things on this earth... need and desire....
we need an ounce of food a day
we need a roof on our head
we need a piece of clothing in the cold
but there is something that mixes with these entities and the need turns into a desire:
we desire to eat all the cuisines of the world, before we die...
we desire to live in 7 storey castles
we desire to wear garments interwoven with gold threads and rob an animals soul to top
it with a fur coat
'There is a limit to our need, but there is no limit to our desire'.
if you truly want to desire, then desire something like divinity... let me show you where it lies...
an orgasm - duration of 2.5 seconds of pure ecstasy
feed a hungry soul - saving him/her for 1 day
treat someone sick - saving him/her for 1 lifetime
teach someone the path of enlightenment - saving 1 galaxy system
the above 4 are crude figures that sum up the joy that one feels and mine is a desire to teach as many as I can the path of enlightenment and so I have it on my consciousness to be better then yesterday... for an engine should always be running at a higher rev. then the tyres of the car.
Pardon my insults on you if you experience them from me from time to time, I have a big task at hand, and just a small (recycled) bag to place you all in... so I have to trunk as much as I can off of you (your desires, wants) so that you fit in my small bag, not to mention 100 billion stars that are out there in the milky way that have to be bagged too ... (scratching my head)
where will I take you? to God of course.
What did you do while you were alive? - God
I brought you all the light of the whole milky way - crudebliss
{smile} - God
So here's to the ones who I love... (especially at Gaia) I'm not jealous anymore, (but a quick message/comment still feels good) and you all; will be in my heart; always.... A place where no one can take you away from me...
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Ending the blog by saying... you are born free; to follow your own heart... but let the lives of the people of the past be a reminder that you will only suffer without God.
Curb your desires and stick to your basic needs.
Try to nurture your good qualities and you'll be able to suppress your negative ones easily.
Yours telepathically:
Crudebliss
This blog is dedicated to Sharon: 
my ‘mind blowing sacred angle'; she hasn't stopped holding me until now, the irony is that she feels 'she' is draining me of my love; whereas I feel I am draining her of hers. What a wonderful way to be.
Access: Public
Oh But I am still holding you.. and we are both born free , as we all are.. and there is only LOVE .
Hi Janak,
Learning to let the desires come and go–not, I mean, to “come” and go, but just to come and to go. Oh look, there's another desire. Isn't that nice? That's the challenge I suppose.
Oh, I'm a bad girl, but you already knew my heart is the heart of a pirate. So true.
Listening to that guy sing Born Free, that was very nice. I was thinking of how much we could let Divinity shine through us, if we could only allow our ego to recede.
If you are jealous and want our attention, how much more attention does God give us every second of our lives? I wish only to send you a smile that in some way gleams with just the tiniest reflection of Divine Love!
love love love
we need it but it can drive us mad…
sigh
Beautiful blog…you'll be here in my heart, always …Janak, my friend.
Peace On Earth, and throughout the stars…forever more.
Thank you for the lessons.
J
Dearest J, you've done it again. Delivered a “mind-blowing” blog. I've to admit, it made my Saturday…er Sunday too….oh heck…all the days of the week…. :-)
And I think I absorbed your entire message… lovely and profound and a great reminder…
that….
“The seeds of all things exist in you as in me.” We were all equipped with negativity and positivity… for survival… and if we study the animal kingdom, we would see that the a true lion (lol…not those crazy man-killer ones…)uses his negativity sparingly….he only kills when he needs food…. and as for his positive side…he walks off and leaves the remainder for other creatures….(he doesnt hoard it for tomorrow) But us humans, hmm….I am surprised the planet still have food for new-comers …sigh…I am guilty of everything I accuse my fellow humans of… (howvever…these days I try to live low-maintenance but it's one of my biggest challenges…trust me on this)
So I see eye to eye with you here….when desires becomes bigger than “our basic need”, it could create an imbalance not only for ourselves but for the entire planet..
.(So…an ounce of food for me…sure…as long as it comes with all the essentials packed in that ounce…oh…I need some berries too….and I am willing to pick my own….. As for a roof over my head….I wouldn't mind settling for a cave…eww…just keep the crawlers away… but aw shucks…do I have to give up my sari interwoven with golden threads? This latter one is tough!!! ) Lol…
PS: Love the songs!! And you'll always be in my heart…so here…”take my hand, may this bond between us never be broken…”
And keep on writing deep, inspiring and insightful stuff…
With love
Amy :-)
My soul-mate & I …. R of that age that Matt Munroe could never spoil our sunday but …
AS I have said elsewhere …
DESTINY IS that which one discovers … IF every opportunity, with which you are faced, is responsibly acted upon in all humility. FATE IS what you are faced with if you don't.
YES I DO subscribe to ALL that you have posted in your Born free…. as free as the wind blows…. but the essential difference between homo sapiens and our animal relatives is that homo sapiens has the capability to truly understand the BIG PICTURE and the capacity to realise that we are ALL part of GOD's illusory game and NOT in command of our own illusory game.
Once we acknowledge THIS and allow GOD to BE GOD from within us … we can then ACT RESPONSIBLY, in all humility. to establish the balance & harmony of the DUAL forces of energy, of which the BIG PICTURE IS constituted.
Namaste J. for another brilliant blog.
:-)
Great blog!!!!!!